Wedding Do’s and Don’ts – Mother of the Bride Winning Wedding Tips
As the mother of the bride, in many ways, the role is pretty simple. You are there for moral support, and you are there to ensure that your daughter has everything they need to make this one of the best days ever. But there are some mothers who, consciously or not, end up causing issues.
As a parent, sometimes we can easily overstep the mark and offer too many opinions or think that it’s our place to bring up problems that can result in disagreements. Mother and daughter relationships can be very fractious relationships but they can also be one of the closest.
If you are concerned about overstepping the mark or upstaging the bride, let’s show you through this article ‘Mother of the Bride Winning Wedding Tips‘, some approaches to ensure that you are sticking to the best possible etiquette.
Mother of the Bride Winning Wedding Tips
Mother of the Bride Do’s & Don’ts
Mother of the Bride Winning Wedding Tips – Do’s & Don’ts #1
DO – Be Careful with What You Wear
It’s your daughter’s big day and they want it as perfect as humanly possible and this means that, as the mother of the bride, you’ve got to avoid stylistically clashing with them. It may seem obvious, but you should never wear white or anything close to the bride’s chosen colours (unless requested).
Never outshine your daughter and make sure that you avoid things like loud patterns or anything that makes you stand out. Additionally, it should go without saying that you make sure your wedding outfit isn’t too revealing, the biggest tip here is to keep it classy.
Remember, you literally do not want to take anybody’s eyes off the bride! Suppliers like The Wedding Shop showcase a variety of mother-of-the-bride dresses/outfits so you can keep it modest and ensure that you are dressed appropriately for the day – in something elegant and classy, rather than upstaging the bride either consciously or unconsciously.
Mother of the Bride Winning Wedding Tips – Do’s & Don’ts #2
DO – Know Your Boundaries
There are parents who are sticklers for tradition. There are others who are happy to go with the flow. As the mother of the bride, you may feel that you should get in on the ground floor to ensure that your daughter has the most perfect day, but your role is to provide general advice and support throughout the wedding without dictating what should happen.
It could be so easy to interfere because you are so close to them and at the same time your daughter will want your help, but she doesn’t want you to take over the wedding prep. Even if she’s feeling the stress of preparing for the big day, you’ve got to follow their lead and ensure that they fulfil their expectations, not yours. It’s worth considering some of the following:
- Listen to what she has in mind.
- Prioritise her happiness.
- Don’t tell her what she should do but instead let her come to her own conclusions.
You might not think that you’re a meddling mother but it can be so easy to overstep the mark. There can be ways that your interfering filters into the prep. Perhaps you don’t think much of the person your daughter is choosing to marry or you think they’re not doing enough to prepare for the big day. What you have to remember is that if you start offering opinions left, right and centre and disguising them as opinions rather than meddling it’s going to result in a lot more stress for them. And you will invariably feel like you are being shut out as well. It’s important to not overstep your boundaries and keep the peace.
Mother of the Bride Winning Wedding Tips – Do’s & Don’ts #3
DON’T – Make the Wedding About You
We’ve all heard of bridezillas but there’s also such a thing as mumzillas. As a mother of the bride you might think that you’ve got a stake in your child’s wedding because it’s your child or you’ve put up some of the money. There are parents out there who want to take over, don’t be one of those parents.
Again it’s about knowing what your duty really is. Consider your role as moral support to the bride and remember when the planning gets underway feelings can easily get tossed aside.
You don’t want to add fuel to the fire but when you’re in the midst of wedding planning you can easily start causing problems in little ways. We know all too well how to push our loved ones buttons and sometimes we can feel like we’re being shut out of plans or we should have more of an input. Bite your tongue and remember: it’s not about you.
Mother of the Bride Winning Wedding Tips – Do’s & Don’ts #4
DO – Keep Your Decorum on the Big Day
The father of the bride traditionally has a speech and therefore they get a little bit of the limelight on the day and as a mother of the bride you might feel that you need to elbow your way to having some of that glory as well. But this is a lesson for both parents of the bride: you should never steal the show or do anything that could upstage proceedings.
There’s a lot that can go wrong on the big day. We can consume a little bit too much table wine and can be a little bit extra lubricated or we can feel we need to swoop in on the morning of the day because something has fallen through. We should never steal the limelight throughout any stage of the day.
There have been many examples of bridesmaids who feel like they need to kick off in order to get a bit of attention for themselves. If you learn only one thing it’s to make yourself your daughters rock as much as possible during their big day.
Any proud mother will feel that this special day is an emotional one but unfortunately, there are mothers out there who use this as an opportunity as an amazing party about them. A wedding should be an amazing day that celebrates love, that creates a whole new collection of wonderful memories but they can also create a number of memories that will potentially cause ructions. Your goal as mother of the bride is to help be part of the former.
Photos by Hermes Rivera